the aftermath
by mIsS sHoWjUmPeR
Summary: pony is distraught after johnny's death. will anyone ever be able to reach him? will he ever get over johnny?


Ch.1

Its been three months since Johnny's death. I guess you could say I've changed a lot since then. Sometimes I find myself running outside to talk to him but then having to remind myself about reality. It hard now. There's no one except Soda that I'm really close to. Darry and I get along but we're not exactly tight. Two-bit and Steve are their usual selves, being nice but not paying too much attention to me. So now you could say I'm alone but I don't like to put it that way. It hurts too much.

Our gang is tiny now. Just five of us. I've lost so much weight and I really don't amount to much in terms of being useful in a fight. But there haven't been very many of those lately. After the death of Johnny, the Socs have left us alone. Everything is so quiet lately because of this...

"Pony! Stop daydreaming and come here!" yelled Darry. I sighed. Darry is still the same drill sergeant he always was. "Come fix this math, you got 6 wrong!" School. I hate it. I used to do well but now I usually get C's. "Look at this Pony....this is simple stuff. I don't know how you could get this wrong. But if you don't start going back to your old grades, your going to get it."

I sighed again. There was nothing I could say. "Yeah, sure Darry, I'll try to," I said none too enthusiastic. "Try? You'll do better than try. If you get less that all B's this quarter, you"ll be in big trouble. I know its been hard for you with Johnny not here but you have to move on in life." That last sentence got me choked up. I couldn't move on. I miss Johnny too much. He was such a big part of my life.... my best friend. I turned away as I felt the tears well up in my eyes. "Pony....its OK," Soda came into the room and put his hands on my shoulders. "Johnny wouldn't want you to be like this you know...he would want to be like your old self, not all depressed and moody like you are now." That made me really start crying. I tried to stop but couldn't. Nowadays, if anyone even slightly mention Johnny, I broke down. I don't think this is what Johnny meant when he told me to stay gold. It's something I can't help. Soda took me into his arms and just held me and let me cry. I buried my head in his shoulder. If it wasn't for him, I would be a lot worse. I guess I appreciate him a lot more now than ever. He's the only one that understands me.

I guess I fell asleep because I found myself in my room, in bed. I got up and went to go out the door but stopped short. I heard Darry and Soda talking and decided to listen. "I'm really worried about Pony." Darry said. "He hasn't been himself for the longest time. I mean I never see the kid happy. He used to be so full of life and now he's so depressed." "I know," Soda went on. "I thought he would get over Johnny's death. That's why I never really tried to stop his grieving. I mean its OK to be sad but Pony is over doing it....it's not healthy." Wow, I never knew my brothers were this worried. Was I really this serious? I mean I miss Johnny but I had no idea anyone noticed. "...He's so lonely, and barely eats. If the kid keeps this up he's going to get sick. And I mean really sick." Darry stated. He slowly got up and sighed. "I try so hard to keep you and him happy. If anyone else notices he's like this you know where you and him are headed," he told Soda. Soda got up too and patted Darry on the back. "You do a hell of a job at it too. You are what kept this family together. And don't worry about Ponyboy. I'll take care of him." Soda stretched and started towards our room. I dove back onto the bed and pretended to be asleep. I heard him walk in and sit down on my bed. He didn't move for awhile. I felt his rough hand push my bangs out of my eyes. "Pony, why are you like this?" he asked me. "You're so different from what you used to be. You were always so full of life, joking around and being goofy but now...little buddy, you need to cheer up. I know it's hard without Johnny. We all miss him and Dally and I know you two were close but you do need to move on, you dig?" He was talking as if I could hear. "And you wanna know something? It's just killing me and Darry to see you like this, especially Darry. He tries so hard to keep us as a family. I really can't take seeing you like this much more. It hurts me to see you so sad. It's like you have no more zest for life. And if you keep this up, we have an even better chance of being put in a boys home." I had never heard my brother talk this way before. It really made me want to cry and this time not because of Johnny. "Pony, we just want you to be happy, to be your old self. Me and Darry can't take this no more. Ya gotta stop...for us." I heard him sob. I wanted desperately to get up and just hug him and tell him everything would be OK. So I pretended to just wake up.

"Soda?" I said sleepily. "Whatsa matter? Are you OK?" He lifted a tear stained face and looked at me. I couldn't stand it. I threw myself at him and just yelled his name. He held me so tight. We were both crying. "I love you Soda," I said through sobs. "I love ya too Pony, You have no idea how much it killing me inside to see you like this....no idea," he cried. Darry walked in hearing the noise and he said nothing, just sat down and hugged both of us. He kept whispering how everything would be OK. I had never felt so close to my brothers before....but now I didn't want to let go of either of them. We just sat there in one silent, giant hug for the longest time. I was all cried out and felt myself dozing off....

When I woke up the sun was blazing through my window. Suddenly I felt someone lightly punching my shoulder. "Hey Pony...or should I say sleeping beauty?" Soda teased "Soda is that you?" I said drowsily "Yup, how ya doin' kid?" he asked. I groaned "Good I guess, what time is it?" I asked sitting up. "Oh about 12:30. You were out cold. Darry's at work and I didn't have the heart to wake you up." 12:30? I guess I was more tired that I thought. "What about school, won't Darry be mad I didn't go?" "Naw, he said you needed a break." Soda told me "It's just you and me today so you want to do something?" "Sure" I said "but Soda, about yesterday....was I really that bad? I mean about Johnny dying...." my voice trailed off. "Yea kid. You were pretty depressed but your gonna be OK now ....right?" he said quietly. "Of course...I didn't mean to worry you and Darry so much, it's just that with Johnny gone now...I have no one." Again I had to stop. I really didn't want to cry now. "You got me kid," Soda said "I'll always be there for you. No matter what." He looked at me all serious. "Now enough of all this emotional stuff. There's been too much of that lately." He got all excited again, like a little kid almost. "So what do ya want to do Pony?" he asked me, jumping up and down on the bed. "I dunno...whatever you what to do I guess." Soda rolled his eyes. "Typical you...so enthusiastic." I wasn't going to let him get away with that comment and the next thing I knew we were on the floor wrestling. "Say uncle!" he shouted. I tried to fight but he had me pinned in two seconds. Was I out of shape or what? Out of breath and panting we both got up. I got changed and ate. Then we both left to go do whatever Soda and his brain wanted.

Ch.2

It turns out that we went to his gas station. Even though he had off today, he wanted to visit Steve. No surprise there. He got me a Pepsi and went to talk to Steve. I followed him and listened to their conversation which was mostly about cars and girls. How exciting. Soda talked about girls but never about Sandy. On the outside it looked as if he had forgotten her, but I knew the truth. At night, I heard him cry sometimes and I knew why.

I wandered around, watching cars pull in and out. Suddenly I heard a faint yelling from the back of the station building. I ran around and what I saw was not pretty. There were some Socs, up to there usual dirty form of entertainment. They were beating up what looked to be a kid smaller than me. The kid was screaming and the Socs kept hitting him again and again. On the head. One of them jammed his foot into the kid's side and I saw him gasp for air as he passed out. My hand flew to my pocket where my switch was. But I reasoned that even with my knife I wouldn't stand a chance against them. I started screaming for Soda. He and Steve came racing around the corner of the building. "Hey!" Steve yelled as he and Soda made a dash for the Socs. The Socs left the kid and raced away laughing. I slowly crept toward the still figure lying on the ground. Steve and Soda were right behind me. I took one look at the kid and felt sick to my stomach. "Pony....I think you should go back....." Soda started. I couldn't say anything so I just shook my head. Soda bent down and pushed the hair back from the boy's face. Steve and I were standing up beside him staring. My whole body felt like jelly and the only thing I could think about was when Johnny got jumped. I shoved a cigarette into my mouth to calm me down. Soda was trying to pick the boy up. Suddenly he gasped. He backed up and one look at his face told me something was horribly wrong. He was as white as a sheet and was trembling. I knew it had to be something really bad for him to be like this. "Sodapop, what's that matter....what's wrong?" Steve asked. I just stared. He tried to talk but his voice came out all shaky. "T-that's not what you think i-it is," he stammered. "Huh?" Steve questioned "Soda are you OK? You're making no sense." I saw him gulp and try to talk. He wouldn't stop shaking. "Soda? What's going on...You're scaring me," I told him tugging on his arm. "Pony.....your going to think I'm crazy.....but that's not a boy your looking at." I looked at him more wide eyed than before. "What? You mean the Socs attacked a......" I stopped and stared at him. "They're mean but they would never do that....." my voice stopped again. Soda bent down and pointed. "Look at the face....there's no question; that's a girl." He was whispering. Steve was just staring. He had gotten all pale too. I took a closer look. He was right. It was a girl but hardly looked like one. Slowly Soda picked her up and brushed the hair out of her eyes again. It was a light auburn color, almost like mine and was very short. She wore worn out jeans and a big t-shirt. Honestly, she did look like a boy. The Socs beat her up pretty badly. There was a long gash on her thin arm and her face was bruised. Her breathing was funny and it looked like she had a broken rib. As Soda moved her over to a secluded spot, she started to come to. She took one look at us and her eyes opened wide in fear. They were a vivid green and kept darting from Soda to Steve then me. She acted almost like a caged in animal. "Are you alright?...you got pretty beaten up back there." Soda asked quietly. She just stared. Her eyes seemed almost haunted. Almost like Johnny's, constantly darting, wary of everything. She slowly picked herself up, and stumbled a few steps, never taking her eyes off of us. Soda jumped up "Where do you live? You're in no condition to walk home like this'" he told her. He grabbed her arm. She just pulled away and started off. She limped out of the station and onto the road. Steve and Soda tried to stop her. I was frozen to where I was standing. I saw her look at them and walk off. Soda kept trying to stop her. Finally I heard her yell at both of them to leave her alone. She started off again and in a few minutes she was gone. "Soda shouldn't we stop her?" I asked ask he walked back to were I was. Soda was still shaken up. "I tried kid," he told me. Like me, he couldn't stand to see girls cry or hurt."Those Socs will pay for that," he told Steve. " Beating us up is one thing but girls just goes too far." Steve nodded. "But maybe they didn't realize it was a girl," he stated. "I mean it took us a while to realize it and they might not of noticed at all." Soda didn't respond. "You OK Pony?" he asked me. "Yea, just shaken up...I hope she'll be alright." I murmured. "Me too kid. I've never seen her before....I wonder....." Soda stopped. "Well Pony," he said "Just wait until Darry hears about this...those Socs will pay, I can promise you that." With that he said good bye to Steve and started on the way home with me. "Pony, that was horrible. Are you sure your OK after seeing that?" I looked at him. "I'm fine but you....you looked like you were going to pass out." I told him. "I almost did. I can't stand to see girls in trouble of any sort and that.....that was just wrong. Darry will be home soon so we'd better hurry up. He won't be happy when he hears about this one." I had never seen my brother like that before except when the same thing happened to Johnny. It scared me. I just hoped that Darry wouldn't react in that same way.

Ch.3

Darry didn't but he was none too happy. After hearing the story, the first thing he wanted to do was find the girl to make sure she was OK. "If she was as banged up as you two said, we better find her to make sure she got home alright." Darry told us. He said we should deal with the Socs later. So me, Soda and Darry wandered around town with no luck. We looked every where. Two-bit came by and decided to do something useful for a change after he heard the news. He didn't do much but follow us and talk though. After looking for about three hours though we gave up. "Oh well," Darry said. "I don't think we're going to find her, but if she's not in town, chances are she got to where ever she lives OK." Soda and I just nodded. "Do you even know who she was?" Darry questioned Soda. "Nope," he replied. "Never seen the kid in my life. But she seem so frighted of us. It looked like that wasn't the first time she was jumped." Suddenly Soda looked at me. "Pony, she looked to be about your age, small but still your age. You ever see her before? Like in school or something?" I shook my head. I would have remembered seeing someone like that. I couldn't get her picture out my brain. Those eyes, blazing green, seemed to look right through you. I kept seeing them, replaying this afternoons events. There was something about her I couldn't get off my mind. In a way she was just like Johnny but yet she was his exact opposite. I don't know why I was even comparing her to him but.......

I still wasn't very into girls but was working on it. There were a few pretty ones in my class but they wouldn't dare look at me let alone say something. I thought back on my experience with them. There was Cherry, who actually called me dreamy ( I still remember that.....I wonder why?) But she was totally out of the picture now....Then there was the girl in yellow who had called me a hood. I still remember that too. I guess it would take me awhile to get used to girls. They confuse me.

The weekend went by with no excitement. Darry and Soda decided not to go after any Socs after all. They didn't know who to go after and didn't want to start any more trouble than necessary. Monday rolled around faster than usual. I hated school, not the work aspect either. I was one of the only greaser's in my grade. I couldn't stand the looks I'd get from the other kids. It made me feel like I was dirt, just because of my martial status. The worst part was walking through the halls. The Socs went out of their way to trip me, knock over my books or check me into the lockers. But there was nothing I could do about this so I just buckled down and tried to ignore it.

At lunch, I sat down alone, as usual. Suddenly I heard someone say something directly behind me. I whirled around and almost fell out of my seat. "Can I sit with you?" a soft voice asked. I looked up. What I saw startled me so badly.....It was the girl from the lot, the one the Socs beat up. She was dressed just the same. Her cheek was swollen and her side looked to be bandaged. I just stared at her. "Well,...can I sit with you or do you want to be alone?" her eyes seemed to be searching me, looking through me. "N - no, you can sit." I awkwardly moved over. I didn't know what to say. She slid into the seat next to me. "Hey," she said. "My name's Chemi. What's yours?" "Ponyboy," I stammered. "I remember you, you saved me from those Socs." That brought me to me senses. "I can't believe they attacked you...I mean they hurt us - boy greasers but...." "I'm not a greaser,"she told me, her voice rising. "Don't think for one minute that I want to dress this way or be here like I am, I have no choice." I looked at her. I didn't mean to say that. Like I said, I get nervous around girls. I tried to explain "No, no that's not what I meant. I -I..." She looked at me all funny, then slowly got up. As she walked off into the school crowd, her words kept replying in my mind, _I have no choice_, _I have no choice_.

Back at home, I relayed to Soda and Darry what happened. Of course I left out the personal things. They both asked if she was okay and I reassured them she was. I was surprised at their lack of curiosity though. Here I was burning to know who she was, what she liked, what had happened and they seemed to care less. Whatever. I had too many things on my mind to worry about my brothers' lack of curiosity.

Ch.4

A few nights later, I went to the Nightly Double with Two -bit. Glory, does that kid like to talk. He never shut up. Never. I left him at the corner telling him I was going to walk home by myself. I needed some time to think and he was getting annoying. The night was clear and I looked up, staring at the stars. I remembered Johnny and how we used to look at the sunsets and stars together. I felt a pang of loneliness. As I walked absorbed in thought, I breathed in the night air. It was so peaceful, so quiet. I liked nights like this. There was something about them. As I walked home, I let my mind wander. I wasn't paying attention to where I was going because the next thing I knew, I had tripped over something and fell flat on my face. I winced as I slowly got up. I had slammed my arm on the curb and it hurt like hell. But I soon forgot the pain. I heard someone come up behind me. I thrust my hand into my pocket where my switch lay. But instead of a hard, cold voice telling my how I was a dirty piece of white trash, a quiet voice asked why the hell was I not looking where I was going. I turned around surprised.

There was Chemi, sitting on the curb glaring up at me. I stood up sheepishly. "Sorry, I didn't see you," I muttered embarrassed. "That fine," she said. "What are you doing out so late?" she asked me. Me? Out late? She was the one just sitting there. "Nothing. Just walking home. But what about you? You're sitting out here and not going any where." She looked at me. Those eyes. I couldn't look at them. They saw right through you. "I not going anywhere because I have no place to go," she said quietly. It was my turn to look at her. "So you're gonna sleep here? Alone?" I asked surprised. "Yea, I always do, I don't want to go to my house. It's hell there." Her head was down as if she was ashamed. I had seen this before though, with Johnny. "Why?" I prodded. "Do your parents hurt you?" I realized how juvenile that last statement sounded but I didn't know what to say. She let out a long sigh. I sat down next to her. She sighed again. "I live two blocks away from here," she started and I could tell by the way she was talking she had almost forgotten I was there. "I live alone with my dad. He hates me. It all started when I was little. I don't remember what happened but my dad has no problem reminding me, especially when he's drunk," she stopped and looked at me. I wasn't surprised at this. There were probably lots of kids with this story on the east side. But I guess that wasn't the whole story because I heard her sigh another time and continue.

"I wasn't always like this," she said. "We used to be a family. He always tells me I was the cause of every thing going wrong. I have a mom. And no, she's not dead. I hear my dad talking about her all the time and how it was because of me they got divorced. After I was born, for some reason my mom just didn't want me. My dad had just lost his job and I guess she didn't want any extra expenses. She wanted to give me to an adoption agency. But my dad refused to give me up. My mom got so angry at his stubbornness that she just picked up with my older brother and left. He said she had pleaded with him to let me go, to live with her and my older brother but he refused. I don't know why he wanted me so badly. After she left, I guess he tried to talk sense to her but she wouldn't listen." she stopped and took a deep breath. She suddenly started again, but this time she seemed almost angry. "It was really his fault, he wanted me. It was his fault he kept me." She was crying now, sobbing. "Why does he hate me now? He wanted me then. It was his fault, his fault!" She was in hysterics, sobbing shaking. I didn't know what to do. She turned her head. I looked at her eyes. They were so full of pain, so full of hurt and anger; so full of wanting to belong. These eyes were Dally's not her's.

I felt a searing pain hit me. I couldn't stand seeing this. I felt so....everything. I put my arm around her. Nothing extreme, just on her shoulder. I felt her body shake with racking sobs. She was so tense. She caught her breath. "But that's not the entire reason," she continued shakily. "I used to be one of them, a Soc. Those kids, the ones who beat me up..." she stopped as if it hurt to much to say anymore. "That... was my..my brother and his friends. The one who hates me most. He hates that I divided the family. So whenever he gets a chance he makes me pay. I don't even know why I'm here. Every one hates me just because was born!" She was almost screaming now. She was broken down, sobbing so hard that it scared me. Her tear stained face was so full of anguish. Her brother? Did that? Her _brother??_ I was shocked. I put both my arms around her. I felt her relax a little. "It ok, everything's ok." I murmured again and again. She kept mumbling about her brother. I felt her put her head on my shoulder. Slowly, gradually, the sobs calmed. Her breathing became even again and I realized she was asleep. I so confused. Her story ...there was just something about it that made my stomach wretch.

I was really tired and I felt my self nodding off too when I saw headlight in the distance. A car was coming around slowly and I recognized it as being Darry's. I'm gonna get it I thought. I had just lost track of reality then; there was nothing I could have done. I was still holding Chemi and she was asleep on my shoulder. I slowly eased her head up and took off my jacket. I rolled it into a pillow and place it on the ground. I gently put her head on it and went to meet the car which was gradually getting closer. I saw Soda in the passenger's seat, head hanging out the window. "Pony? is that you kid?" he asked. "Where the hell-it 2:30 in the morning!" he said when he realized it was me. His usually dancing brown eyes were dark with worry. I motioned for him to be quiet. "Soda, I can explain. The girl from the lot...." I was drained from hearing Chemi's story and I just felt like I couldn't talk anymore. I didn't feel like explaining So I pointed. At this point Darry had stopped and jumped out of the car.

"Pony where the hell have you been?" He walked over. "I swear Pony....you are enough to drive me insane!" he almost bellowed. I felt like I was going to pass out. I shushed him so he wouldn't wake Chemi up. "Look," I said, pointing to the sill figure on the ground. "The girl from the lot." I said again. I heard him gasp. "Soda, can we take her home, she has no place to go," I half asked, half told him. "Sure kid," he said slowly not looking at me. Darry walked over and slowly picked Chemi up. He softly placed her in the back seat. I saw such a gentle look in his eyes. He looked at me like that sometimes, I knew what it meant. It was a look of genuine compassion, affection and everything between. I wondered why he was looking at her like that. He barely knew her. I had he feeling he knew her entire story before hearing it though. Darry was like that. He understood people. But I was too tired to think anymore. I crawled into the backseat next to Chemi's sleeping figure. I vaguely heard Darry whisper something to Soda as he started the engine. I felt my eyes close and I knew no more.

"Ponyboy? Pony?" I felt someone shaking me awake. I groaned and rolled over. "Go away, Soda," I heard myself mumble. "Ponyboy. Wake up. This isn't Soda." I groggily sat up, annoyed. "Ponyboy where are we? Why am I here?" The memory hit my then like a block of ice. Chemi was here. I saw her bright green eyes looking down at me. I fell back onto my pillow. "Your at my house," I told her. "We took you home last night. Go back to sleep." I rolled over again and closed my eyes. I didn't want to talk, I wanted to sleep. But apparently that's not what she had in mind. "Ponyboy listen to me. I have to go. I can't stay here. Won't your parents be mad that I'm here?" she asked. I opened my eyes, rolled them, and looked at her. Like I said I didn't want to talk. I was dead tired and just wanted to sleep. "My parents are dead. I live with my brothers Sodapop and Darry. They don't mind that you're here. In fact, they were the ones that brought you. So you can stay as long as you want."I said rather bluntly. "There's food somewhere in the kitchen if you're hungry." With that I shut my eyes and burrowed under my covers. I was in a really bad mood and didn't feel well. I heard her walk out of the room. Soda greeted her over the blare of the usual TV and radio programs. I put my pillow over my head and tried to fall back to sleep.

After about twenty minutes, I sat up. It was no use. I couldn't fall back asleep especially with all the nosie going on in our house. I grunted, threw back the covers and slid out of bed. "Soda! Is it humanly possible for that damn radio to go off for at least fifteen minutes?" I yelled at him. He was sitting at the table reading the paper, which surprised me, and looked up as I walked in. Oh joy, I thought as I saw Two -bit sitting on the couch talking to Chemi. He was really the last person I wanted to see. "Hiya Pony," he said seeing me. "Hey Two-bit, I responded, not turning to look at him. "Boy someone's in a good mood," he announced sarcastically. I heard him snicker at his own joke. "Shut up," I told him as I meandered into the kitchen. "Knock it off both of you," Soda said as he got up and slapped the paper down on the table. He stretched and headed off to change for work. "I gotta go. Pony, you and Chemi can hang around here or head out but I don't want you going far," he told me. I rolled my eyes at him. "Sure Soda, I promise we won't go far, but I might have trouble keeping that promise. I've been dying to walk to Kansas," I told him. "Pony, one Two-bit is enough thank you," he yelled from his room. I sighed and walked into the living room. Chemi was watching TV with Two-bit but I could tell she wasn't paying any attention to it. I plopped on the couch and stared blankly at the flashing screen. Soda walked by us and headed for the front door. "You two stay out of trouble, you hear Pony? I don't want to some home and find you half dead from the Socs." "I won't-" "I'll watch the kids," Two-bit interrupted. "They'll be safe with me." I snorted. Soda rolled his eyes and walked out the door. Chemi just stared. I sighed. Today wasn't going to be fun. Two-bit annoyed me. He was the same as always, never changing. He thought he was so funny and he definitely talked too much. I hoped he would leave soon. I really wanted to talk to Chemi about last night. Alone.

Well he finally did leave, after two hours of watching stupid cartoons and telling corny jokes. When he saw he was getting no where with us, I guess he decided town would be more fun. "Well I gonna go, Pony ok?" He looked at me. "You kids stay out of trouble, hear?" I rolled my eyes for the hundredth time today. "You sound like Darry, Two-bit. We'll be fine." With that he got up and walked out the door. I sighed in relief. Chemi turned and looked at me "So that your friend Two-bit?" she asked "You could call him that I guess," I told her. She got up and came over to me. I felt my blood rush to my head. And my heart was pounding. I could have punched myself. Why was I feeling like this? I barely knew her. Sure there was something about her that was really....well special but......I inwardly groaned. I was so confused that it made my head spin. As she sat down next to me, I went rigid. And we began to talk and I relaxed. We talked about everything under the sun. I told her my story and all about Johnny. We poured our hearts out to each other that afternoon and from that day on we were inseparable.

Soda and Darry came home to find us deep in conversation, and I felt my face burn as Soda looked at me with a wow you have a girlfriend look; his brown eyes dancing with delight and amusement. I glared at him. He laughed. We had our own way of talking without saying a thing. It scared me sometimes how well we knew each other.

Ch.5

From that day on, Chemi lived with us. And no her dad didn't just let her. Darry had to deal with him and it wasn't easy. She had been with us for about three nights and her dad came looking for her. We were out on the stoop with Soda, talking when he came by. Darry dealt with him. By then Darry and Soda had heard the entire story. Her dad started to yell at us from the street and by the way he was walking you could tell he was drunk. He came staggering up to our stoop. He grabbed Chemi's arm and tried to drag her off. She screamed and Soda jumped between the two of them, his brown eyes blazing. "You leave her alone!" he screamed at her dad. Soda was strong, but he was stronger. He shoved Soda aside and made another grab for Chemi who was cowering on the edge of the step. I stood up between him and her, my temper flaring. How dare he hurt her again. I knew I didn't stand a chance against him but I was sure as hell going to try to stop him. By this time, Darry had heard the commotion and came out. I didn't have to worry about my chances with Chemi's father because Darry did that for me. He calmly walked over and asked him to leave. When he refused, Darry literally picked him up and put him onto the road. It was an almost all out brawl, but with Soda _and_ Darry against him, he finally left. We haven't heard from him since and Chemi lives with us now.

We did everything together. Went to the Nightly Double, hung out, you name it we did it together. Like I said, we were inseparable. I started to fill out and my emotional state was much better. I had found my new best friend. It was like we were a part of each other. I was closer to her than Johnny. She knew me and I knew her. We were soul mates. I would lie sometimes, awake at night wondering if anything would ever separate us. I began to go deeper though. I felt more than friendship when I was around her. Sometimes I would have the greatest urge to just put my arms around her. To hold her and shelter her from everything life could throw at her. I just wanted to tell her that ......I .....well, loved her. I remember asking Soda once, what it was like to be in love and I remember him saying that it was real nice. Well, this wasn't real nice, it was real torture. I felt so much for Chemi and not being able to share this with her or have her return the feeling was sheer agony. When I was around her, I felt like I would burst. I would want to hold her hand, to brush that stray piece of hair out of her eyes. And now that she lived with me, and I was always around her, it got worse. I felt like I couldn't control my emotions.

Well I remember questioning if anything could separate Chemi and me and I guess some things could. We were walking home from the movies one night and we got into the biggest fight. I thought my heart would spilt in two. I felt like I was going to cry. She yelled at me and out of pure instinct, I yelled back even though it tormented me to do so. I can't even remember how it started. "I hate you Ponyboy Curtis!!"she screamed as she ran away from me. That was one of the most painful things anyone's ever said to me. "Fine," I yelled back. "Just don't ever come back to my house again you little bitch!" I shouted at her running figure. I broke down after that. As I ran in the opposite direction the tears came, and I willingly let them fall. They blurred my vision and I ran blindly as fast as I could. I was so anguished and furious at myself. Knowing Chemi, she wouldn't come back. She was so headstrong that..... "So, here's the little greaser who sympathizes my brat of a sister." I stopped short and looked up. There were two Socs standing threateningly in front of me. I recognized the one who spoke. He was Chemi's brother. And the next thing I knew they were pounding the daylights out of me. "We don't fancy trash like you, hanging with my sister," he sneered as he socked my head against the ground. "And so we'll make sure it won't happen again." he said and his friend laughed. I was screaming and struggling for all I was worth. But who would be out here now? I was on the edge of town and Chemi was long gone. Not that she could have done anything.

But I guess I was wrong because the next thing I knew, a voice of steel cut through my yells and the Socs sneers. I looked up and there stood Chemi, switch gleaming in the moonlight, her green eyes blazing. "You leave him alone." Her voice cut through the night air like a knife. "It's me you want." They dropped me and looked at each other. I was hurt, but not too badly. They made a lunge for her but I jumped up and yanked my own knife out of my pocket. I stood next to her and flicked the blade out. There we stood, facing her worst fear, together. "Get the hell away from here." I spat the words out. Her brother, and his friend backed off slowly. They didn't have any weapons and knew they didn't stand a change against us and our knives. They jumped into their car and floored the gas as they sped away. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief and glanced over at Chemi. She was breathing heavily and trembling. "Thanks," I said quietly. We both turned and walked toward my house. "Look, I'm sorry....." I stopped because I knew that if I continued, I would start to cry again. We walked in silence for about a block and then Chemi just stopped. I turned and looked at her. Her shoulders were shaking. I stepped over to where she was standing. Her deep green eyes, filled with tears looked at me. But these weren't angry or hurt tears. I could tell. I looked into them and they looked into mine. It was then that I knew. We didn't have to say anything. I brushed my hand against hers and she didn't pull away. I tuned and faced her. I put my hand under her chin and brought her head up. "Chemi....I...." The words just wouldn't come. But she looked up at me and that told me. She fell against me and I put my arms around her waist. She buried her head in my shoulder. And I held her close to me for the longest time. "I love you Ponyboy," she whispered into my ear. I could have only dreamed of this. How long had I waited and wanted to hear these words? Her body was against mine and as I felt her heart beat against mine, I knew that we were made for each other. I felt tears of joy come into my eyes. She picked her head up and our eyes locked. My lips brushed against hers and slowly, we kissed. Again and again. I have never felt so happy, loved, and everything. We pulled away. She smiled softly at me; her once pain stricken eyes danced, now full of affection and joy. She was so pretty, just to look at her, made my heart melt. I brushed her hair away from her eyes. She ran her hands through mine. I replayed tonight's events in my mind and knew that my question was answered. Nothing, absolutely nothing could ever separate us permanently. That night, I felt that another huge thing was resolved. I gazed up at the stars as Chemi and I, hand in hand, walked home. I would always miss Johnny but know I know what Darry meant about moving on. I will never forget Johnny but now, I have found my soul mate and no longer need him. I whispered up at the stars to him that night, with tears in my eyes. "I'm gold now Johnny, and forever that I will be. Good bye."

The End

**I worked really hard on this....so please be nice and hit the little go button down thurr to review!!!!**

**Thanx 3**


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